Paleo Salted Caramel Chocolate Bacon Bark

I think that every word in that title is awesome. Any one of those in a dessert is great and if you combine them, its like multiplying awesomness.  At my CrossFit box's holiday party, they were going to have a paleo recipe contest.  When I read this recipe on Civilized Caveman's blog, I knew it was the one I was going to make.

George, from Civilized Caveman, got a copy of The Paleo Chocolate Lover's Cookbook, and he shared the recipe on his blog.  My local library has 16 copies and one is on hold for me. I'm waiting with bated breath.

All in all, its pretty easy to make, but it does take some time to allow the chocolate and caramel to cool.  When I made a larger, second batch, I actually took advantage of the unusually cold weather we were having in Seattle to cool my caramel on the back porch!

My daughter helped me with these photos. The film strip doesn't do them justice.

Don't worry that the recipe has warnings to wear gloves, the coconut milk and sugar don't seem to get as hot as non-paleo caramel's cream and sugar, but do use a large enough pan.  I made a single batch in a 2 quart sauce pan and it does bubble up.  Do clear a bit of space in your fridge so that you can fit your chocolate to cool on a flat space.

Reading the recipe on my borrowed tablet on a Belkin Tablet Chef Stand!

Also, give it plenty of time to cook.  My first batch, I cooked a little hotter than my second batch and it came out much more like a sticky caramel candy, but it was harder to drizzle over the top of the chocolate.  My second batch, I simmered longer, but at a lower temperature, and it was a thick caramel sauce.

You'll see in one of my pictures, I wasn't using parchment paper, but some plastic wrap.  Make sure whatever layer you use covers the sides of your pan, don't just use a Silpat. The chocolate will leak under and stick to the pan and you won't get nice bark.

Bacon, bacon, bacon!

I also had one not-really-a-problem problem.  Both times, I had too much bacon.  I mean, too much bacon for my candy, but between my kids and I, we ate it right up.  Some problems, like high sales rates, are good problems to have.

The Paleo Salted Caramel Chocolate Bacon Bark was a hit at the party, even among the people that weren't all that into sweet and savory combined into one.  Alas, it was not the winning recipe of the night; that honor went to a Korean BBQ chicken recipe.  I'll admit it, it was really great chicken, cooked perfectly, with just the right amount of smokiness from the grill.

If you make it, let me know how it goes!

A strange week indeed

The week before last, was a strange one. Several of the interactions I had or observed had weird role reversals.

My wife is a hottie. When she changed her profile picture on Facebook, I wasn't surprised to see the comment that she was a MILF.  I'd agree with that statement. But what was weird was that the comment came from someone I assumed was straight and know in a social context.  Great sentiment, but not from a source I expected.

The kids and my wife went thrift shopping and somehow my wife convinced my oldest to dress up and take some pictures.  He's looking pretty fly, no?  Well, it seems that a self-identified adult lesbian thought so too (in a non-creepy way).

I've been eating paleo for a while and my breakfasts have been grilled chicken tenders, bacon and avocado. It's great, I can grill them at home for the week and bring it into the office and re-warm in the microwave and chop avocado there.  Hot breakfast, great, healthy paleo food can't be beat.  So, it turns out that a vegetarian co-worker said, while being serious, "Looks like a healthy breakfast!" It was like 80% meat!

Lot's of role reversals here, but there wasn't a full moon. What do you think was going on?

My own brand of awesome

My friend Whit is going to get to do something pretty awesome: interview the cast of the Avengers. But even more awesome, he's going to get to interview Scarlett Johansson, who plays the Black Widow in the movie. But she's Scarlett Johansson in real life. And he'll get to ask her questions and talk to her. I bet if it were me, I'd say something to the effect of "Buh, uhm, yeah, well."

Scarlett Johansson as the Black Widow, image courtesy Popoholic www.popoholic.com

So, I'm making my own brand of awesome.

A few weeks ago my wife said that we shouldn't eat bacon and deli meat because of the nitrites (or nitrates, I don't know which - don't talk bad about bacon).  Respecting my wife, I took that to heart and considered it. And decided to make my own.

Two weekends ago, I brined nice big turkey breast and then mesquite smoked it.  I sliced it as thin as I could, to make my own deli meat. Its a little thicker than I'd like it to me, but it has a nice smoked flavor and isn't dried out.  It ended up even costing less than deli counter meat, working out to about $6 per pound after I cut it off the bones.

This weekend, I'm taking it one step further. I left work early on Friday so that I could make it to my local butcher, Fischer's Meats and buy an uncured pork belly.  Yes, I'm going to cure and smoke my own bacon. Try that on for size, Scarlett and Whit!

It will take several days, almost a week, for the pork belly to cure.  I'm salt curing it with a little brown sugar and rubbed sage (and no nitrates). Next weekend, I'll smoke it, slowly with hickory.

Don't you like to rub your belly?

Can you see the awesomeness?

I'll keep you posted on how it develops.

Whit, you should ask Scarlett if she likes bacon.

And I must send out thanks to my neighbor JH, who gave me a jump start when my battery was dead Friday when I left work early to get to the butcher before it closed.  He drove to the park and ride where my car was, jump started my battery and I made it to the butcher with less than 10 minutes to spare.